Thank you God-Awful for this gleefully horrific portrait!!
Thank you God-Awful for this gleefully horrific portrait!!
Gosh. Time flies when you’re having “fun”.
I feel like blogging is something I do when I don’t have anything else to do…. which is true to some extent.
Thanks to Beach Bum Berry I’ve become a hard-core drinker of rum.
Just got back from Colorado where the kiddo scoped out the college-of-choice. I liked it, although the price tag makes my knees weak.
Rev is doing just fine. Still trying to work out his allergies. Started on hydrolyzed food and he’s turning into more of a Collie. He doesn’t bark, or yip, it’s really more of a “hey!”, “hey!”, “hey!”. Still a boss.
Not much else to report. Trying to get a “bring your own pineapple” party together soon, maybe pics. Follow my Instagram for something slightly more updated than this blog.
Did I become a rum snob?
Did it happen? My first drink was a rum and coke (thanks Lee Finch!) and of course, everything comes full circle. As I tiki-quest now, sipping rum becomes a part-time past-time.
I’ll have to detail what went wrong (or right) but I picked up a haul the other day at some local booze stores. I have more, but this pretty much encapsulates the good stuff.
I used to hear women say, “I wish I could find a man that cooked!”. Being a Gen-Xer (remember those?) I never fully mastered full on cooking but I’m pretty handy at baking. Over time, I’ve found that f you really want to impress some ladies, get your baking mitts on. I’m sure there’s a whole psychology to it all, but ultimately who doesn’t like tasty boozy desserts?
With that said, I felt it was time to divulge my most requested tip-top secret calorie-free* Double Rum Cake. A few things first. This is a no-nut recipe. Even though I’m a fan of the nuts, nobody in my household is. Secondly, I don’t prep my pan until right before I’m about to throw it in the oven. That seems to be backwards, but I like to go my own way.
Prep time: Approx 30 minutes
Bake Time: 1 hr
Glaze time: Approx 30 minutes
1 .5 oz rum (prefer Deadhead)
1 large cube of ice
1 Rocks glass
(1) Bundt Pan. The flutey kind.
(1) Package Yellow Cake Mix (16.5oz). Whichever package looks best. I prefer the one that doesn’t have pudding mix in it already, this is a massively-bad-for-you cake.*
(1) Package Instant Vanilla Pudding Mix (3.4oz).
1/2 cup filtered water
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1/2 cup light rum (Appleton Estate V/X preferred)
1/4 cup sugar for dusting the Bundt Pan
1/2 cup unsalted butter = 1 stick
1/4 cup filtered water
1 cup white sugar
1/2 cup dark rum (preferably Kracken)
Fried Turkey Marinade Injector
A Pair of Hands (or only one, triple prep time)
Hand Mixer (unless you’re a sadist, and prefer a spoon)
A thin spatula
3. In a large bowl, surgically open the cake mix and pudding mix. Sift them through a sifter together to mix well, alternately, mix them up with a fork – comingle their assets. Sifting takes longer, but impresses anyone who happens to be watching, and the consistentcy ends up being like cake flour.
4. In a small bowl, mix the eggs (like you were making scrambled eggs). Add the 1/2 cup water, 1/2 cup oil and 1/2 cup rum to the egg mixture and whisk well.
5. Add the egg/oil/mixture to the dry mixed powder and then use that Hand Mixer (quaint) or wooden spoon (torturous) until it’s smooth. Use the spatula to make sure all the batter gets mixed, push it back down in the the main mix.
6. Liberally spray the bundt pan with the non-stick-cooking-spray, especially around the center shaft. Shake the indeterminable sugar amount around the bundt pan. It will stick to the spray. Science! Pour the batter into the magical bundt pan.
7. Bake for 60 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into the cake comes out clean. While you’re waiting, read ahead.
8. About 20 minutes before the cake is ready, make the glaze. In a saucepan, combine 1 stick (1/2 cup) butter, 1/4 cup water and 1 cup sugar. Bring to a boil over medium heat and continue to boil for 5 minutes, stirring constantly. Remove from heat and stir in 1/2 cup rum. Load this glorious mixture into your Fried Turkey Marinade Injector. You won’t fit it all in the injector , that’s where the silicone brush comes in and you can reload as needed.
9. About 2 minutes before removing the cake from the oven, put the towel in the sink (seriously!). Wet the towel with hot water. After removing the cake from the oven, put it on the towel. You’re going to leave it for 10 minutes, but while it’s innocently sitting there, you’re going to start basting and injecting it with the special rum glaze. Use the silicone brush first, to slather rum sauce over the bottom of the cake, then take your time and lovingly inject the sauce. I typically use about half the sauce covering the bottom of the cake and injecting, then the other half once the cake is out of the pan.
(My white hand threw off the color balance, so the cake looks sickly now. It’s still the same cake)
10. After the 10 is up, turn your cake out onto a plate. Use the spatula again to ensure that your cake doesn’t stick to the sides or shaft of the bundt pan. Once it’s on the plate, keep using the silicone brush to brush some glaze on the top and ouside of the cake. Continue to inject the cake with the deadly rum venom until all the glaze is used up. Glaze to taste really. If you see pools of glaze on the plate, you’re going too fast. You can’t consume the rum that isn’t in the cake – take your time.
11. After you have used all the glaze, stop, admire your work, and let the cake rest. Seriously. You’ve been stabbing it and brushing it for about 30 minutes now.
11. Eat it.
I’ve heard that keeping the cake covered in the refrigerator overnight improves the rum flavor, but I’ve yet to have any make it that long.
* Not Really
Here’s my new eighty pound best friend. This guy is perfect. And huge.
Gets along with the cats, obeys and is generally just the most mellow fellow out there.
If you are here via satanoscillatemymetallicsonatas.com, welcome! (I bank useless URLs.)
So, the blogging thing has really taken a back seat to all the other things I’ve got going on right now. The Bees are in pretty rough shape. I quit logging their stuff until I get it under control. Multiple waves of ignoring (or overthinking) what my books told me left me with about 6 weeks of trying to get all the wavy comb straightened out in my hive. It’s heading into winter and due to this, there’s a chance there may not be enough honey for them to live off of.
I started to check the hive yesterday and my neighbor started vacuuming her pool. I’m lighting my smoker and about to expand by another bar but she just opened her back door. There may be a plot against me now. Maybe it’s about the cats (longer story). I just checked and things are slowing down. It’s getting cooler.
Old Age Realization:
Tardiness is one of my pet peeves. A strong pet peeve. Tardiness is a lack of respect for other people’s time.
My other anxiety ties closely to parking. There’s never enough. Anywhere. I don’t mind parking far away and walking. That’s not my problem. My problem is then that I have to leave earlier, so as not to be late, and then walk the distance that it takes from where I parked (which has to suitably be marked that I won’t be towed.)
Combine the two, and it’s just a recipe for anger and frustration.
Partial Inspection: Day 93
Blooming: Crepe Myrtle is still blooming around the ‘hood.
Bar 12 is now okay. Bars 13, 14 had a slight “puff” so I sliced those out. Bars 15 and through 16: Wavy:
Bar 17 is next to the follower board, so the small comb they’re building on 17 is straight. I scraped off some of the wavy and pressed some straight on 15 and 16, so I’ll have to check again next weekend.